This is The Well’s stated priority for 2019: “We want to develop more and more devoted disciples who are known by these practices: we pray together, we practice hospitality, and we care for people in need.”

What will these practices look like? Here’s what Carlton and I hope they look like:

Prayer Trios. Many years ago, when we first moved to Brussels, a friend introduced us to a concept called “Spiritual Friendship.” The idea was that three people would get together for a set period of time, maybe an hour. That hour would be divided equally in three 20-minute parts. In the first part, one person would be designated to share, the second to listen, and the third to pray. Then, for fifteen minutes, the first person would share what was on their heart—maybe on a specified topic, or in answer to a question, or perhaps just what was going on in their lives at the time. The listener would give them all their attention, asking questions only as necessary for clarification, with eye contact and empathy. And the third would spend the time praying for each thing that left the lips of the person talking; maybe they would use Scripture, maybe write, but the main job would be to pray.

After fifteen minutes, the person praying feeds back to the person the things they have been praying, Scripture that has come to mind, things they felt the Spirit saying, encouragement (not the same as advice!), and a brief final prayer for them. Then the roles are switched: listener becomes sharer, pray-er becomes listener, and sharer becomes pray-er. Each person gets an equal chance to share. Each person is heard in a meaningful way, and gets to offer that to another. Prayer and sharing are given the same amount of emphasis.

Carlton and I have been in prayer trios for much of the time we have been in Brussels. We have found them to be deeply formational to our spiritual lives, encouraging honesty, vulnerability, and accountability—all desperately needed, especially by those considered spiritual leaders. We have had different partners as people have come and gone from Brussels, and each has enriched our lives. This is a gift we would like to give to others at The Well (and perhaps to you as well!)

Hospitality in homes. The early church in Acts 2 was known for its hospitality. But today, the practice of inviting people into our homes is becoming rarer and rarer. Homes are considered private cocoons rather than spaces where others are welcomed. At the same time, when we do invite people it is often fraught with anxiety as we seek to emulate the elaborate “entertaining” standards presented by magazines and cooking shows. Hospitality becomes a show, a performance rather than something real.

I was fortunate enough to grow up in a home with hospitable parents, who welcomed all kinds of people. When I was small, this was in spite of straitened resources. Some of the people we hosted needed a place to stay for a night or a week or a month—sometimes more. Some just needed a meal or a friend. Most of the time it was kind of fun, like when an Aboriginal visitor played his didgeridoo for us. Other times it was a bit of a pain, as with the missionaries who took over my bedroom with their Bible study materials and our kitchen with their health food equipment. But it added up to a rich environment and a deep lesson in the importance of welcome. Carlton and I have tried to continue this legacy, and the apartment we rent in Schaerbeek was chosen with this in mind.

Carlton and I hope for our community at The Well that they discover more and more the joy of welcoming one another into each other’s homes. We have seen it happening! One young couple who just bought a house stood up in church a couple of weeks ago and told us how they felt the Lord had given them this house to welcome others. They even offered a place to stay for the friends and family of other members of the community if they needed it!

Care for people in need. This is kind of a no-brainer when you are involved with something like Serve the City. And of course this is part of what we mean—that people in our community would sign up to go out in the city in a serving event or weekly project that meets the needs of the poor in our city.

But we also hope that it will involve an awareness that permeates our community of people in need as God brings them across our path: in the street, in our apartment buildings, in our church. Recently in The Well, we rejoiced with an Iranian refugee who got his papers, and mourned with a Syrian refugee whose mother had died and could not return for her funeral. We have brought meals to new parents, and helped furnish the apartment of an Albanian woman. Our WhatsApp group dings constantly with prayer requests and assurances that others are praying for them. “People in need” aren’t just out there—they are also right next to us.

Carlton and I would love our community to be known for caring for the needy in our city, and also for those right around us. After all, Jesus reminds us, “whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.”